Every year at this time, thousands (maybe millions) of women start to worry about the season bikini. Some of us do something like diet and exercise, trying to get our body to look more like women in magazines.
Since we were teenagers, we believed a baby in a bikini gets the boys. The better we look in a bikini, according to belief, the better our chances of catching the attentions of a man. In a superficial way, that is right. The female form, slightly dressed or otherwise, is sure to attract male attention.
However, this is where the power of the bikini stops. Although able to attract the attention of men, it fails to attract male affection. We falsely hoped that the attention would lead to affection. This is because we have grossly misunderstood the effects of attraction.
Many things that I have learned about men in the last fourteenteenteen years have surprised me. Some shook my world. No one was at once delighted and annoyed me as much as I learned about the actual effects of attraction on men and women.
Good and bad news on the attraction
Seem to be two types of attraction, which affect men. The first type is what we call Sexual Attraction. What causes a man to be sexually attracted are the things that we have been selling for years: shiny hair, a well made body, sexual energy and sensuality.
This type of attraction causes a man to want to have sex A woman in particular. And that 's all. That is all. These are the bad news about sexual attraction. It annoyed me to discover it after so many avoidable misfortunes with men.
Sexual attraction simply does not produce the results we seek in our lives. It does not make a man to sue a romantic woman. It does not call a man. It does not make a man to consider a woman a potential partner or make her fall in love.
A woman who is very sexually attractive will get a lot of male attention – but nobody seems to wonder if it is a good attention. As I envied sexy cheerleaders in high school, surrounded by boys at lunch, I never wondered if all that attention was satisfying or rewarding their lives in any way. I just wanted. And I was sure that the attention I was looking for would lead to the affection I wanted.
The second type of attraction we call "Charmed and Enchanted", which means attracting by very nice qualities and evoking great admiration qualities. This type of attraction causes a man to want to spend time with a woman, take care of her, make her happy, protect her and contribute to her life.
This is the good news about the attraction! And there is more good news – here is a list of things that hundreds of men from all over the country have told us to make a charming and enchanting woman:
· Be passionate
· Interest of other people
· Willingness to need a man but not be "needy"
· Love men
· Understand that men are not like women
· Appreciate the unique qualities of men
· Think for herself
As you can see, making a charming and enchanting woman is as good for women as for men. That's what I liked most about the effects of attraction. The more you love each other, the more men like you. The more you can be yourself, the better chance you give men to know you and love you.
The more you appreciate your life, the more people appreciate your company. The more you appreciate men, the more men will appreciate you. The more you think for yourself, the more interested men are in your thoughts.
I offer this information in the hope of preventing unnecessary anguish and suffering. By focusing on the effects of attraction on men and women, you can approach relationships with more intelligence and authenticity.
You can focus on the person you want to be, instead of the size you think you need to be. Best of all, trips to the mall for this new swimsuit are much less traumatic.